Ok so, last Friday, my friend called me and asked if I was up for a hangout. Being that it was the end of a busy week, of course I wanted to chill out and unwind. So I said "yeah man!, I'm in!".
As dedicated as traffic is to Lagos roads, took a couple of hours but we finally met up and then headed out. We drove around for a bit and then got to this place, somewhere in VI. Place looked kinda quiet on the outside, didn't show any signs that anything was even happening there, until we went into the building and I started seeing posters on the wall of girls posed as Strippers. That's when I asked "is this a strip club?" and my hangout buddies burst out and literally LOL'd at me...I wanted to punch myself in my imaginary nuts for asking such a lame retarded question!.
Anyways, we approached the door and the bouncer opened for us. The chilly room and loud music first greeted me.
Then lo and behold:
The Strippers were doing their thing, going up and down 'em poles, doing stunts and stuff. I was trying not to look like a first timer so that I no go fall my hand. Lol!...Ok, so a couple of minutes into our being there, a stripper came to me and whispered in my ear saying "I'd like to strip dance for you" and I was like "for free?". She laughed and said "no". I smiled and said "no, thanks" and she left.
I continued watching the Strippers...I used to have this thought that watching girls strip and dance naked would get me all turned on and all that shii, but as I watched these girls, I kept thinking, what if one fell on her neck and broke it? Why is that one dancing like her body's oxygen level was dropping? Did that Stripper just dab? 😂😂😂...Was it the way they "stripped"? Chai!. If I had to rate them I'd give 'em 0/10. The girls stripped like they were about to be raped and had a gun to their head or something. Taking off the panties and bra or whatever they had on without any sexiness at all!. Is it the dancing? Boring as boring!. If the poles could move or even talk, they'd say "ahn ahn!, wetin?!, change style na!". It seemed like all the girls had just one routine which was going up on the pole, spiraling down and then spreading their legs wide open while they shake their asses...boring!. Lol!
Anyways, same Stripper came back with her offer. One of my buddies told her to go ahead and strip dance for me. She started grinding on me, whining her waist so seductively that I had to grab it. She got up, turned and faced me, adjusted my sitting position and then sat on me like she was about to ride my imaginary *clears throat*. Her champagne glass sized boobs were looking at me with almost 100% focus. Well, it all lasted for about 5mins. I'd say that was the highlight of my experience. Everything else besides the booze and music was pain to my eyes.
Will I visit a Strip Club again?. I don't think I will. My reason being that I don't see the point in what they do plus I think only a few men will visit strip clubs and still respect women. It's sad that those girls resorted to stripping as a means of livelihood but their choice. Personally, Strip Clubs aren't my thing but well, experiencing it isn't a bad thing, so at least I could say "been there, done that" ;)
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